Rocco Simonelli
A former mercenary joins a military academy as a teacher. He soon discovers a neo-Nazi group, code-named Werewolves, formed among the cadets. He also quickly finds that they have military leadership among the officers at the Academy.
When teacher Randall Thomasson is killed during a carjacking, an unexpected visitor shows up at his funeral - his estranged brother, Karl Thomasson (Treat Williams). An ex-Green Beret turned mercenary. Karl signs on as a new substitute teacher in order to investigate Randall's murder.
Who says crime doesn't pay? The mob will pay Jimmy Corona anything to stay away. But, then again, so would most people. His agent brushes off Jimmy's latest book proposal: detailing the conspiracy between Lee Harvey Oswald and Marylin Monroe to assassinate JFK. His girlfriend gives him his walking papers in the midst of wild sex when he can't give her one good reason to stay. Actually he's too exhausted to speak. And to top it all off, he's suffering from writer's block. So what's a poor guy to do? Join the mob?
Tells the story of Mr. Softee, a mutant hybrid with an ice cream cone for a head, who was the victim of the anti-miscarriage drug "Nodroppinum" which changed the pregnant mother's child into whatever food she craved at the time (a parody of the Thyladimide scandal from the 60s.) Softee was the head of an ice cream company, until he was forced out of business by the artificial ice cream mafia, led by Don Tofutti.
